No parents teach incorrect things to their children in any part of the world. But having said that, there are things that they think that would help their kids and being an Indian child, I can relate to it.
Below is a list of some correct things taught by our parents which not be the best for us:
Well, I have never been the kinds to keep quiet when I see something that is clearly wrong, but I cannot deny the fact that I have faced some severe consequences for doing so. Maybe, sometimes I could have been more calm and explained my point but even then, as a child, I was considered wrong for doing so.
a) If you want divorce because of domestic violence , Indian parents be like, “Have a child, and everything is going to be sorted.”
b) If you want divorce because he/ she love someone else , Indian parents be like, “Have a child, and everything is going to be sorted.”
c) If you want divorce because of dowry , Indian parents be like, “Have a child, and everything is going to be sorted.”
Below is a list of some correct things taught by our parents which not be the best for us:
Voicing own opinion to any elder is absolutely wrong and that makes you a bad child.
Well, I have never been the kinds to keep quiet when I see something that is clearly wrong, but I cannot deny the fact that I have faced some severe consequences for doing so. Maybe, sometimes I could have been more calm and explained my point but even then, as a child, I was considered wrong for doing so.
After marriage
b) If you want divorce because he/ she love someone else , Indian parents be like, “Have a child, and everything is going to be sorted.”
c) If you want divorce because of dowry , Indian parents be like, “Have a child, and everything is going to be sorted.”
For girls
Your self worth is based on how well you cook and take care of home. This is something every girl is taught and told since she can remember. Why does a girls worth be based on how well you can cook or clean? Why does it matter at age of 15 for example what your future-in-laws might think?
It’s sad that it’s tried to settle in a girls mind that eventually this is the life for you and nothing better can ever come from marriage.
It’s sad that it’s tried to settle in a girls mind that eventually this is the life for you and nothing better can ever come from marriage.
'Not to do things just in the fear of what will ‘the people say or think’or 'Follow the crowd'.
If you want to be a Tattoo artist or a Dancer by profession , then they’ll be like , “Char logo ko mein kya jawaab duga (How am I going to face the society ?) ” .
Every Indian child reading this would have gone through situations like, ‘Do not wear this/that’ or ‘If you do this what will so and so think’.
It's very difficult to come peace with the fact that we have to do things based on what others MIGHT think. They are not a part of our struggles. They are only part of the viewing of problems. Then why give them such priority?
Every Indian child reading this would have gone through situations like, ‘Do not wear this/that’ or ‘If you do this what will so and so think’.
It's very difficult to come peace with the fact that we have to do things based on what others MIGHT think. They are not a part of our struggles. They are only part of the viewing of problems. Then why give them such priority?
Grades are above everything.
To achieve anything in life you should have good percentage in your academics even if you can’t, and sometime parents be like, “Verma ji Ke beta se zyada aane chahiye iss baar (I want you to score more than X’s son).
Social equality of men and women.
Now this point is not valid for every Indian household. But still many Indian parents have a default setting that men can do so and so just because they are men. Women are not supposed to. Why? Because it isn’t safe. I understand certain things when it comes to safety but things like guys can take girls out because no one cares and everyone knows guys do such things. But in case a girl is even seen talking to a guy, parents, family, society, far off relatives of the society, everyone judges the girl and then follows all the taunts. Great. Why??? We need to start making India a society where men and women are treated equally.
Dating is wrong. But getting married based on them choosing an absolute stranger for you is so normal and is ‘right’.
A humble request to all the Indian parents to please try and understand that this is not going to work for long. Say one more generation would MAYBE go with this to make you happy or whatever reason but it really depends.
No doubt that divorce rates in India are the least and most of them are arranged marriages but at what cost? Majority of the people there are scared to part ways for one simple reason ‘What would society think of us’.
If your child would like to choose someone someday, you should obviously have a say but emotional blackmail and throwing kids out of the house is not right. Instead, if you talk to your kids right from the beginning about what should one choose in a right partner and what is actual happiness of life (day to day), maybe your child would definitely make a wise decision.
And lastly, if they choose whom they have to, they wouldn’t want that at the cost of their family not talking to them forever. Why not support them and be there?
No doubt that divorce rates in India are the least and most of them are arranged marriages but at what cost? Majority of the people there are scared to part ways for one simple reason ‘What would society think of us’.
If your child would like to choose someone someday, you should obviously have a say but emotional blackmail and throwing kids out of the house is not right. Instead, if you talk to your kids right from the beginning about what should one choose in a right partner and what is actual happiness of life (day to day), maybe your child would definitely make a wise decision.
And lastly, if they choose whom they have to, they wouldn’t want that at the cost of their family not talking to them forever. Why not support them and be there?
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